Here at the Devil’s Demons, I’ve decided to take on the task of educating both myself and readers alike. So let’s start a little vocab study. We can kinda pretend this is something like Mr. Roger, or Sesame Street.

Today’s word is Alliumphobia, or  the fear of garlic. Many of you reading this may possess such a fear, as do many of our favorite characters from the anals of horror. Alliumphonbia can be a crippling disorder, resulting in:

breathlessness, dizziness, excessive sweating, nausea, dry mouth, feeling sick, shaking, heart palpitations, inability to speak or think clearly, a fear of dying, becoming mad or losing control, a sensation of detachment from reality or a full blown anxiety attack.

As you may have heard, vampires suffer dearly from this phobia. Vampires and garlic do not mix well. As a result, garlic has become a staple in any vampire hunter’s arsenal. If you need some garlic, here are a couple of options:

Garlic Mints

Easy to fool vampires with, garlic mints are a nice choice. Most vampires have bad breath anyways, so they won’t be suspicious when you offer them a breath freshener.

Garlic Beer

Apparently, some crazy people out there have been brewing garlic beer. This seems ridiculous, but I presume you could get a vampire drunk enough and start slipping him pints of garlic beer after a dozen buds have already been knocked back.

Garlic and Shots

Take a vampire to London, and then take them to Garlic and Shots. They’ll think you’re being cute, and you can probably lie and say that it’s just “garlic flavoring” and not real garlic. Say it’s a place where vampires go to mock humans. They’ll think it’s very cute and kitschy and will play along. I’ve been there several times, many while living there, and the potency of the shots promises to knock even the most durable vampire down.

Garlic and Shots. Doesn’t sound very evil does it? Ohhhh but you are quite wrong sirs, quite quite wrong.

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