When you think of “Midnight Meat Train,” your first reaction may be gay porn. Not here at the Devil’s Demons. It’s horror movie time! And what better way to celebrate the holidays than with a horror movie viewing.

I loved this movie. I’m slightly biased, since anything with Clive Barker’s name attached to it (except for maybe his weird artsy indie nude films) I immediately qualify as amazing, but this movie was truly fantastic.

My family and I watched this movie the day after watching The Hangover, so it was an interesting role change for Bradley Cooper. Needless to say, he got fucked up in both flicks, but by different means.

Midnight Meat Train starts off a bit slow in case you are expecting instant gobs of gore, but ends up piquing your interest as the story behind the butcher starts to slowly unfold. I found myself on the edge of my seat as  Leon began to follow Mahogany, bringing himself closer and closer to the devil of a man.

I was waiting for him to jump out at any moment, and caught myself gasping quite a few times as quick camera work or sudden movements kept my nails bitten and Coors Light drank fastly.

I had read the story in the Books of Blood, so I was slightly disappointed that the story didn’t focus a bit more on Mahogany, specifically on his pains as his job wore him down over the years. Granted that became obvious at the end, but still. I am a nitpick.

Overall, the movie is great. There are tons of sick kill scenes, but a sort of cartoonish blood appearance makes it easier for the weak to stomach. All I have to say is tongue, fingernails, and meat tenderizer. Everyone’s good in this movie, and Cooper does a great job of portraying one becoming obsessed and slowly losing their mind and sense of reality.

It’s sad this never saw the light of day in theaters (at least “normal” theaters). Boo big movie studios.

Volume 2 of the Books of Blood specifically. Now, I don’t know about you, but I have a terrible habit of quickly forgetting books after reading. I mean, like a week later. Sometimes more quickly. I will even force myself to re-read them, and will not recall a bit of the story. It’s sad I know, but when you do as many unwholesome things as I do, it is bound to happen.

However, even though I couldn’t have recalled one iota prior to picking up the book, every vivid detail of Clive Barker’s Books of Blood Volume 2 crept up from the depths of my memory. I read this book almost 10 years ago. Probably had not though about it since then. But reading it, I felt the exact same way I did sitting on my bed those years ago.

Images that repulse and sicken, images that befuddle, images that amaze, images that make you question our very existence. Basically, everything about the stories in this book are incredible. I could not stop reading any of these stories. Getting on and off of the subway is the only thing that stopped me.

My personal favorite has to be Jacqueline Ess: Her Will And Testament, mainly for the vivid imagery and grotesquely detailed deaths that present physical impossibilities, yet described seem completely plausible. Barker’s knack of forcing you to consider ideals and personal motives that you wish to avoid continues to baffle me.

You can’t buy them individually anymore, but buying Volumes 1-3 wouldn’t be a bad idea. A good month’s worth of nightmares surely.

If you want to see a sad yet genuine display of girly excitement and childish behavior, witness Vincent and I watching a horror movie trailer over and over again, discussing how “sick”, “brutal”, “ridiculous”, or “yay!” the movie looks.  

For myself, there is an additional multiplier involved when said movie is a Clive Barker vehicle.  Ever since I discovered Pinhead and the Hellraiser series, eyes-wide in my friend’s basement clutching a blanket and a 2-liter of Mountain Dew, I knew horror was for me.  Fast forward to today, and I am super-stoked to see his latest offering, Midnight Meat Train.

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