Where was this stuff when I was a kid in need of an evil merry-go-round?
Saturday, March 28th, 2009 by PriceI absolutely love these posts.
I absolutely love these posts.
Why are you keeping things like this from me? What did I do to you? Fuck you for not letting me have this.
So I am in London, one of the most evil cities in the world, and am quite ashamed at the lack of evil things I have been doing here. Sure, partying my face off is pretty sinful, but that’s the norm. I need to turn it up a notch.
If you didn’t know, Jack the Ripper did his living and killing in London. And it was well documented. So there are plenty of self-guided walks available to retrace his steps and try to spook yourself out.
Seriously. I’ll read/interpret/raisemyeyebrows at this magazine later this week, but seriously? I mean, I stumble off of the train this morning in Paris, walk into a magazine stand, and this is the first magazine that catches my eye:
So I know France isn’t known for a well bred history of metal, but there’s still metal here. All I could find in magazine form though was Rock Hard magazine. Pretty Vanilla name, pretty corny, but whatever.
I pick this mag up, and something catches my eye in the upper right corner. Are you kidding me? :
This is why I love Europe. You can just do shit like that here. That statement makes absolutely no sense at all, and cannot in any way be interpreted as a reflection on the actual quality or badassness of the magazine. But it is still goddamn metal.
So since I’ve done nothing but drink the past month in London, I figure I’ll start writing about all of the places I have been drinking.
But barely. London has been running a rough one on me. I did however do a Jack the Ripper walking tour that I’ll write about shortly.
This is an awesome concept.
So I’m sitting here in Charleston South Carolina, and figure there is a lot of evil here. You know, slavery, summer heat making people do crazy things, whiskey, etc. All leads me to believe there’s a lot of evil buried here, literally and metaphorically.
So I search a bit, and come across a story about Satan Ale, which apparently was removed from a local Piggly Wiggly. So not really a Charleston-specific evil, but a good start on my quest to discover it.
First off, great name. Naming your beer after the man himself is the easiest way to our hearts.
Secondly, good logo. Go evil.
Thirdly, I have lost all respect for Piggly Wiggly.
Fourthly, not sure which I would prefer, the Satan Red or the Satan gold. Tough choice.
I wanted cake. So I searched for some. Here are some delicious-looking yet veritably evil dessert items.


It’s hard to find cool-looking horror-related clothing. FrightRags has some decent stuff, but It’s mostly very difficult to find any horror-related clothing that’s not god awful. Well this hoodie (Seriously Wikipedia? Fuck you.) from Electric Zombie and offered at ThinkGeek is just all around Bad Ass.
Sporting what I’d call a “Rob Zombie” asthetic, it combines faded black & white newspaper clippings of an apparent zombie attack with a sweet, succulent brain pattern inside the hood. I’m not crazy about the pattern on the back, but it does remind me of some excellent old horror movie posters, so I can live with it.
Amazing? Yes. For only $50 you can’t go wrong.